Sunday, April 1, 2012

Vanity vs. Reality

When I was a little boy, my mom used to say "Don't Brag!  or Don't be Too Proud."  When simple phrases, with too many meanings are used with kids, parents must be able to determine which meaning they want and explain it.  This chapter my mom skipped.  Truly, given the circumstances that she was brought up in, I totally understand.  But when we kids become adults, we are saddled with the responsibility of choosing which of those childhood admonitions work for us and which to toss out.

See what my mom meant was not to be a braggart.  And I totally see her point.  No one wants to be around someone who is always measuring their dick and bragging.  (Well maybe occasionally, but not really.)  That person who RUNS the party, the office life, the que'd up line that never ever stops bragging about themselves, their possessions (including kids and animals).  Those who use their perceived successes to lord over others.  My little "Angel" is the best best best best best....  YUCK!

Unfortunately, what my mom accomplished was to influence me to allow myself to always be second.  Always holding the door for others to be ushered in.  I am proud to say that I do like to see others succeed, but not at my own expense.  Or at least not always.  So as I grew from a kid to an adult I had to learn that having a Healthy Ego was not the same as being a braggart.  In my un-humble opinion, the person who can't be proud of themselves and toot their own horn are often put themselves in second place.  Even when they win.

Now onto my favorite Capital Vice: Vanity.  I am vane.  At least in my own way.  See vanity affects each person differently.  For me it's my hair and face.  And I am not ashamed of my vanity.  I have some of the best hair on earth.  It's been fried within an inch of its life all to many times (blond, brown, black, black with raspberry rinse, back to blond, onto platinum, back to blond, but never red or any other non-naturally occurring color, and then most often back to blond.)  And within reason, it's almost always adapted.  It is getting a little thinner and a lot greyer, but "Damn it, it's still there!"  At three times in my life I tried to curl it.  And all with horrible consequences.  So now, I choose short, long, parted left, parted right, spiky....  But never curly.  Currently, it's mostly brown and gray.  (Yes I have spelled with both gray and grey.  I looked it up.  Both are correct.  ha ha)  Only time will tell where my hair ends up on the spectrum.

Now onto my face.  I truly am slightly, intensely obsessed with my own face.  After all, it seems to go with me everywhere I go.  And that is the part of my anatomy most people talk too.  (Except Mr Drapes, who talks to my left shoulder tirelessly.  What a weight.  The right shoulder is so jealous sometimes.)  I love my eyes, blue on the outer edges and green on the inner edges.  It is rare that I see photos of people's eyes that I think mine look like.  I once saw a picture of Jacqueline Bisset and thought we had similar looking eyes.  But it's rare  In nearly every photograph taken of me, only the blue shows up.  But I see something more.  I love my nose. And I love some of my chins.  One could go away for sure, but the other two I sorta like.

The only lasting visible scar from my biking boo-boo is a scar next to my right eye.  I am NOT happy with it.  I have tried lots of things and some days it looks as if it's slowly going away.  But I am not always a patient man.  Especially when it comes to my beauty.  And one friend even suggested it adds character.  Who the fuck wants character?  I AM a character, and a half some days!  So the scar will have to go away.  My non-insured bike boo-boo will end up costing me north of $7000 and as I told Mr Yellow Jacket, I don't want to spend another $7000, but that scar will go away.

As this post is getting long, I will end it with a picture of my scar and a link to a short film that got me to thinking and wanting to post all about the above.  I HIGHLY recommend a watch.  It's about 10 minutes and so beautifully shot.

Thanks for riding....

Pic above, link below:


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